JayPalm... As Lethal As It Sounds

So Much To Say, Just Not Now

2010-07-05T16:25:00.000-07:00

The past few months have been a blur as many unforeseen changes have or are coming about for the family here shortly. It's funny to think that at the beginning of the year, I thought 2010 might actually not be a a crazy year. Oh how I was wrong! As I stare down the second half of the year, I can see the world changing, thank God for peace throughout the craziness. More to come... as it unfolds.

Christians, Don't Read This.

2010-03-21T21:47:00.000-07:00

I had to believe that a little piece of America died tonight. Many people will stop reading this blog, thinking that I am referring to the passing of the HR 1099 Health Care bill. I'm not. What I am referring to are the passionate leaders of the church that I see downplaying the hottest issue in America right now. I am watching countless 'tweets' and facebook posts float across my screen, as religious leaders ask 'if God really cares about healthcare?', and 'will we care about this in heaven someday?'. Are we that out of tune with our own nation and the people we are trying to reach with the love of Christ?

Proponent and Opponents to the bill agree that you will be effected. They can't necessarily agree on how you will be effected, but all can agree that this is a defining moment in America. If everyone's effected, then it's important to understand both sides of the issue and form an intelligent stance on the issue. You may not blast it from the pulpit, but understand that people are hurting on both sides of the aisle.

When will Christians in America spend a few minutes directing some of their passion for the nation they live in? How do you passionately 'burn' for a nation who has suffered a national disaster that was out of their control, yet shrug your shoulders as the nation that you live in willfully adopts a measure that has the potential to 'rock' America (Although this is obviously yet to be seen)? Cheery churchgoers, have spent the past several decades looking the other way while abortion has become legalized, The Ten Commandments have been removed from Federal buildings, and the words 'one nation under God' were almost removed from the pledge of allegiance. Someday, America may not welcome my Christian beliefs at all. What does that have to do with health care? We don't know, and that's the problem.

If the wording would allow your 16 year old daughter to have a federally funded abortion without your consent, would you care then? If it enabled cancer treatment for a loved one, who formerly couldn't be treated because of 'a pre-existing condition', would that matter to you? These questions are running through everyone's minds. If it doesn't effect you now, please don't think that it will never become tangible in your lifetime.

In closing, I don't plan on visiting Africa for missions, but I will support you if that is your calling. I won't be in Haiti helping refugees, but I know many talented people who will be, and I offer my prayers and financial support. As for me, and countless millions in America, the politico is where our passions lie, and when we are on our battlefield trying to do what we believe is right, please don't try to disparage us.

The 10 Things I Learned

2010-03-11T19:24:00.000-08:00

It was a sad day this week, when we learned Nikki's Grandpa Cook had died. He had been in great health, but had an aneurysm that appeared to have dissected and caused a heart attack on Tuesday afternoon. It was quite a shock to us all. I had a profound respect for Grandpa, and it became very apparent to me that he had a great impact on my life . So in memory of Grandpa, here are a few things that I learned from him:

10. Smile for the camera. If 9 out of 10 pictures show you with a smile, there's a good chance that you'll be remembered as "a happy person." We found a lot of smiling pictures.

9. Eat ice cream... not the non-fat kind. Life is too short not to enjoy the finer things.

8. Never retire. Sometimes your job title can change (For instance, from home builder to domestic landscaper), but that doesn't mean you stop working.

7. Tell great stories. When you can live-in-the-moment and vividly remember the smell, touch, sound, and sights, you can capture the attention of even the worst ADHD child.

6. A game of cards and a bowl of chocolate raisins is the best way to spend a rainy day.

5. Tolerate people, not necessarily their opinions. This could also be known as "call a spade a spade."

4. Be generous with your time and talents. It might even inspire people to blog about you.

3. Be smart with your money. This involves living within your means and investing wisely.

2. Family is your most important investment. Your family is the asset that will carry your principles and values for decades to come.

1. Leave a legacy. For many years to come, we'll reminisce the memory of a man, who invested his life in making my world a better place to be. Will that be said of me someday?

A Long TIme Coming

2010-02-05T20:45:00.000-08:00

Mom & Dad In front of 'It's A Small World'

Drewbie & I after fireworks. He's a big fan

Drew wasn't afraid of the characters at all. In fact he had a strange infatuation with grabbing their noses.

Me & My Boy

Whirlwind

2009-11-09T20:17:00.001-08:00

I couldn't believe that my last post was in August. September and October are crazy months and it seems like only yesterday that we were traveling to Disneyland for a long Labor day weekend. So now that the dust has cleared, I thought I'd post a couple cute pics of my boy.

And the Results Are...

2009-08-24T12:46:00.000-07:00

The fact that I'm typing this is a miracle. For those who have been praying, even if you weren't sure for what, I appreciate it.
So, here's the scoop. Last weekend when I left church, I had a headache, and I thought a little rest would help. I took a two hour nap, and when I woke up I felt like I had "overexercised," but based on my lack of current workout time, I knew that wasn't the case. Monday and Tuesday, I still had that over-worked feeling in both my arms and legs, and by Wednesday, I thought the problem could be my back, because my back was feeling 'out of place.' So I took a trip to the chiropractor. By the end of Wednesday, I was developing loss of feeling in my hands, and Thursday and Friday it got progressively worse. Through the advice of the west valley's finest physical therapist, I contacted my doctor and made an appointment for Friday. Upon exam, they sent me to get a CT scan, X Ray, and blood work, and they wanted the results immediately (the term is 'stat' for fans of Grey's Anatomy or Scrubs). By Friday afternoon, I was unable to grip a pen or undo the clasp on my necklace. On Saturday, the symptoms were still present, and I had not received any word about the test results. I was made aware of an auto-immune disorder called, guillan-barre, which attacks the nervous system, and holds similar characteristics to what I was experiencing. The problem is that many guillan-barre sufferers end up on a ventilator for a few weeks during recovery, because it culminates by attaching your respiratory system. Although, I am technically still not in the clear of having this, it is seeming to be a less-likely result.
Then comes the amazing part. After hundreds of prayers, rest, and an abundance of reminders that I really don't have any control over the situation-- I have begun to heal. It started yesterday at midday, when the pain in my arms subsided and the use of my fingers started to come back. The over-exercised feeling went away by mid-afternoon, and I actually had some energy by the evening. As a bonus, there was an NCIS marathon on USA network, so I caught up on episodes that I missed, but I digress. Although I am crazy tired, I still feel that I am progressing toward complete healing.

It was ironic that backstage at church last week, I remember making the comment about how crippling a physical pain can be to our spiritual life, ie.,. it's tough to 'consider it pure joy' when you're staring down the inability to use your hands. When I thought about this, I was reminded of the first chapter of Job, when God asks Satan, "Have you considered my servant Job?" Definitely a scary thought, when you insert your name where Job's is! Especially when you think about what Job endured over the next 40+ chapters! No thanks.
Currently I am left with a knot in my back and a crick in my neck, and a few more doctors appointments. Yet, my CT scan and X Rays came back normal and most of my blood work shows the same. They show that my inflammation is a little elevated, but not enough to be concerned. So I don't know where this problem came from; I'm not sure why it escalated so quickly; but I do know that prayer, and the One who answers prayers are working just fine. Nikki, Drew, and I appreciate your prayer during this time, and we are confident that we would have not had the same resolution, if it had not been for people praying for us. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Obamopoly: Do Not Pass Go

2009-08-05T21:48:00.001-07:00

The object of the game is to destroy American capitalism by having the government take over everything!
Tokens include a bus, a teleprompter, a sprig of arugula and a waffle iron.

*Wanna play? No??? Too bad, you're already playing... And quite frankly, in this game, nobody wins!*

I thought this e-mail was hysterical! Be sure to read the squares on the game board.

Great Quote

2009-07-18T09:28:00.000-07:00

"Sometimes we climb the ladder of success, only to realize that it was leaning against the wrong wall." -- Steven R. Covey

I would hate to get to the end of my days, and have this quote hit me between the eyes.

Are You an Expendable Employee?

2009-07-16T20:33:00.001-07:00

I have read a few publications recently that state how customer service goes down during tough economic times. I never thought it made much sense, considering you would think that businesses would step up their services to capture every dollar they could. So far this week, I have left several messages for various suppliers, and am amazed that I can't even get them to call me back. Doesn't my money spend like everyone else's? I think I'll start calling my employees 'Ensign Ricky' if I hear about them not returning phone calls promptly?

The Search for Logic

2009-06-07T22:02:00.000-07:00

Most of the guys from my "home team" at church met this Saturday morning for breakfast. We do this from time-to-time and have great discussions. This Saturday the conversation was about educating our kids. Each of us will be faced with the dilemma of choosing where to send our kids to school in the few years, and it was obvious from our banter, that each of us were passionate about receiving the best education that we could find. Although we couldn't agree on public, private, or charter education, we did come to the conclusion that we all desired our children to be able gain abilities that formal education does not offer-- logic and reason. When thinking of the education system today, I notice the tendency to teach based on a group of facts that create a "cookie cutter", "by the book" approach to learning. Is this really helpful in turning-out our future workforce? I have guys that work for me that have twelve years of formal education, but still can't tell you the equation of how how to figure out sales tax (and don't even get me started on their abilities to spell)! The lines of the 1979 classic song "Another Brick In the Wall Pt II?" by Pink Floyd came to mind:
We don't need no education
We dont need no thought control
No dark sarcasm in the classroom
Teachers leave them kids alone

Could Pink Floyd have foreseen this dark day in education- when our teaching structure revolves more upon regurgitation of facts, than teaching the ability for children to be able to think through issues and use their reasoning to solve real problems?
Perhaps this is why many brilliant people stop their formal education at the end of high school. Maybe they are smart enough to know that four more years of education doesn't necessarily dictate their earning potential. I know many people that have GED's and make six digits a year. Was college necessary? Were four to eight more years going to make them better at their trade?
I digress. I want Drew to have a great education, and I want to afford him the best of what we can provided. Yet, I am grounded in the fact that life lessons will fall on my shoulders to teach him. To name a few:
1. Relationships 2. How to treat women 3. Personal responsibility 4. How to make money and invest 5. How use logic and reasoning.
I hope that Nik and I can find a great school for him, but I'm afraid that the current education system is missing the mark. At least we know that his education will start-out right, because he will be attending Great Leaps Preschool (Shameless Plug). For some other great educational commentary tidbits, I recommend checking-out Michael Gray's blogs.

The 'Cross' Necklace

2009-05-19T20:52:00.000-07:00

"Darkness is not something; it is the absence of something." --God v. Science

This came to mind today as I sat in on my first day of a case in jury duty. Although I was very apprehensive about the time I would have to spend away from work, it is turning out to be an amazing experience. Without discussing the case, a twelve year old girl took the stand, and after an hour of questioning, she voluntarily spoke of guilt, carving names and pentagrams into her skin, and suicide. It was enough to break anyone's heart. You could tell her words were unprompted and were spoken out of a need to get them out in the open. What happened next though, was amazing. The Prosecution asked a question that I deemed 'very odd.' She asked about a necklace with a 'cross' charm that the girl had been given as a present by her mother (after she had begun inflicting herself). She seemed taken back that the Prosecuting attorney had any knowledge of the necklace.

Her response was priceless: 'It's a cross necklace, with fake diamonds, but it made me feel better. It helped take away my guilt. (Long Pause) Our family believes in God."

I was moved. What an amazing example of what the cross can do for a person's life, and even though this fairly inarticulate girl was not looking to make a spectacle of her religious beliefs, I couldn't help but think that she had. People would look at you funny, if you wore a necklace with an 'electric chair' around you neck, but the cross is well accepted. The cross was a torture device that people suffered and died on, but somehow wearing that sign of capital punishment served as a reminder of a Savior that takes away guilt. "Darkness is not something, it's the absence of something" rang in my head. It took a 12 year old girl to bring the best true-life example that I could have ever witnessed to this quote. Light truly can illuminate darkness. Think about it.

GOD vs. Science Story

2009-05-19T20:04:00.000-07:00

A science professor begins his school year with a lecture to the
students, 'Let me explain the problem science has with
religion.' The atheist professor of philosophy pauses before his
class and then asks one of his new students to stand.

'You're a Christian, aren't you, son?'
'Yes sir,' the student says.

'So you believe in God?'
'Absolutely.'

'Is God good?'
'Sure! God's good.'

'Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?'
'Yes.'

'Are you good or evil?'
'The Bible says I'm evil.'

The professor grins knowingly. 'Aha! The Bible!' He considers
for a moment. 'Here's one for you. Let's say there's a sick
person over here and you can cure him. You can do it Would you
help him? Would you try?'

'Yes sir, I would.'

'So you're good...!'
'I wouldn't say that.'

'But why not say that? You'd help a sick and maimed person if
you could. Most of us would if we could. But God doesn't.'

The student does not answer, so the professor continues. 'He
doesn't, does he? My brother was a Christian who died of cancer,
even though he prayed to Jesus to heal him. How is this Jesus
good? Hmmm? Can you answer that one?'

The student remains silent.

'No, you can't, can you?' the professor says. He takes a sip of
water from a glass on his desk to give the student time to relax.

'Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?'
'Er...yes,' the student says.

'Is Satan good?'
The student doesn't hesitate on this one. 'No.'

'Then where does Satan come from?'
The student falters. 'From God'

'That's right. God made Satan, didn't he? Tell me, son. Is there
evil in this world?'
'Yes, sir.'

'Evil's everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything, correct?'

'Yes.'

'So who created evil?' The professor continued, 'If God created
everything, then God created evil, since evil exists, and
according to the principle that our works define who we are,
then God is evil.'

Again, the student has no answer. 'Is there sickness?
Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things, do they
exist in this world?'

The student squir ms on his feet. 'Yes.'

'So who created them?'

The student does not answer again, so the professor repeats his
question.. 'Who created them?' There is still no answer.
Suddenly the lecturer breaks away to pace in front of the
classroom. The class is mesmerized. 'Tell me,' he continues onto
another student. 'Do you believe in Jesus Christ, son?'

The student's voice betrays him and cracks. 'Yes, professor, I do.'

The old man stops pacing. 'Science says you have five senses you
use to identify and observe the world around you. Have you ever
seen Jesus?'

'No sir. I've never seen Him.'

'Then tell us if you've ever heard your Jesus?'
'No, sir, I have not.'

'Have you ever felt your Jesus, tasted your Jesus or smelled
your Jesus? Have you ever had any sensory perception of Jesus
Christ, or God for that matter?'

'No, sir, I'm afraid I haven't.'
'Yet you still bel ieve in him?'
'Yes.'

'According to the rules of empirical, testable, demonstrable
protocol, science says your God doesn't exist. What do you say
to that, son?'

'Nothing,' the student replies. 'I only have my faith.'
'Yes, faith,' the professor repeats. 'And that is the problem
science has with God. There is no evidence, only faith.'

At the back of the room another student stands quietly for a
moment before asking a question of His own. 'Professor, is there
such thing as heat?'

'Yes,' the professor replies. 'There's heat.'

'And is there such a thing as cold?'
'Yes, son, there's cold too..'
'No sir, there isn't.'

The professor turns to face the student, obviously interested.
The room suddenly becomes very quiet. The student begins to
explain. 'You can have lots of heat, even more heat, super-heat,
mega-heat, unlimited heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat,
but we don't have anything called 'cold'. We can hit up to 458
degrees below zero, which is no heat, but we can't go any
further after that. There is no such thing as cold; otherwise we
would be able to go colder than the lowest -458 degrees'

'Every body or object is susceptible to study when it has or
transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have
or transmit energy Absolute zero (-458 F) is the total absence
of heat. You see, sir, cold is only a word we use to describe
the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat we can measure
in thermal units because heat is energy. Cold is not the
opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.'

Silence across the room. A pen drops somewhere in the classroom,
sounding like a hammer.

'What about darkness, professor. Is there such a thing as
darkness?'

'Yes,' the professor replies without hesitation. 'What is night
if it isn't darkness?'

'You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is not something; it is the
absence of something. You can have low light, normal light,
bright light, flashing light, but if you have no light
constantly you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it?
That's the meaning we use to define the word.'

'In reality, darkness isn't. If it were, you would be able to
make darkness darker, wouldn't you?'

The professor begins to smile at the student in front of him.
This will be a good semester. 'So what point are you making,
young man?'

'Yes, professor. My point is, your philosophical premise is
flawed to start with, and so your conclusion must also be
flawed.'

The professor's face cannot hide his surprise this time.
'Flawed? Can you explain how?'

'You are working on the premise of duality,' the student
explains. 'You argue that there is life and then there's death;
a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as
something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't
even explain a thought.'

'It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much
less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite
of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as
a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the
absence of it.'

'Now tell me, professor. Do you teach your students that they
evolved from a monkey?'

'If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, young
man, yes, of course I do.'

'Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?'

The professor begins to shake his head, still smiling, as he
realizes where the argument is going. A very good semester,
indeed.

'Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work
and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor,
are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you now not a
scientist, but a preacher? '

The class is in uproar. The student remains silent until the
commotion has subsided.

'To continue the point you were making earlier to the other
student, let me give you an example of what I mean.'

The student looks around the room. 'Is there anyone in the class
who has ever seen the professor's brain?' The class breaks out
into laughter.

'Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's brain,
felt the professor's brain, touched or smelled the professor's
brain? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the
established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol,
science says that you have no brain, with all due respect, sir.'

'So if science says you have no brain, how can we trust your
lectures, sir?'

Now the room is silent. The professor just stares at the
student, his face unreadable.

Finally, after what seems an eternity, the old man answers. 'I
guess you'll have to take them on faith.'

'Now, you accept that there is faith, and, in fact, faith exists
with life,' the student continues. 'Now, sir, is there such a
thing as evil?'

Now uncertain, the professor responds, 'Of course, there is. We
see it everyday. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity
to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere
in the world. These manifestations are nothing else but evil.'

To this the student replied, 'Evil does not exist sir, or at
least it does not exist unto itself.. */*/_Evil is simply the
absence of God.. _/**/ It is just like darkness and cold, a word
that man has created to describe the absence of God. God did not
create evil. Evil is the result of what happens when man does
not have God's love present in his heart.. It's like the cold
that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when
there is no light.'

The professor sat down.

My Milkshake

2009-05-04T11:51:00.000-07:00

It's so much easier to facebook or twitter... Here's something to hold you over until the next blog

Am I In Sync?

2009-04-08T22:14:00.000-07:00

The past few days I have been seriously struggling with being "in-sync" with those around me. For the first few days of the week, I had to fill-in for one of my guys, when he went on vacation. Although, he definitely needed the time-off, I can honestly say that doing my job is more than enough work, without piling on someone else's also. I have four guys that I closely work with, along with a family and friends that I interact with daily. Today, the frustration built to unprecedented heights as I felt that I "zigged" and everyone else "zagged." Ironically, I'm wondering (now that I have gotten past my growling phase) if everyone else is out of sync with me, or am I the issue here? I'll be the first to admit that I am intense when it comes to work, and it is not uncommon for me to bite-off a little more than I can chew, but I also realize that's my personality, and I have to be challenged in order to be successful. I crave efficiency and efficiency that happens at the speed of light. My obstacle is inspiring others to have that same craving, when their work barely happens at the speed of smell.
There is a certain rhythm to life, and when you move with the rhythm, everything falls into place, but countering that rhythm causes a chain-reaction of disjointedness. The real question is whether you can keep in rhythm while juggling all the many tasks of life. It's difficult to keep all the "balls" in the air when getting distracted by insignificant details, or other's missing deadlines that effect how you perform. Today, instead of juggling, I ended my day with the urge to pummel several people with the same ball that they are supposed to help me keep in the air. Thankfully, the urge to go postal has subsided, and I know that tomorrow is a new day. A little sleep tonight, and the outlook for tomorrow should be looking-up.

What Would You Ask For?

2009-03-22T18:02:00.000-07:00

Our message this week at church asked the question, " If you could ask God for one thing, and you knew He would answer it, what would you ask for?" Just thinking of the question makes me as weak in the knees as the Cowardly Lion when he stood before the great and powerful Oz (Of course God would have much cooler special effects than Oz). This question was thought provoking, because the message was about the resurrection of Christ, and that if God could raise Christ from the grave, what isn't He capable of. I trust God to take care of the smaller areas of my life, and I believe that He does amazing miracles everyday in this world, but what would make him mindful enough to be concerned about what I "want." I petition God to work in situations and in my life daily, but what would I ask if I knew that God would "throw the switch" and my request would be answered instantaneously?
I'm reminded of the end of Bruce Almighty (Random Bruce clip below) when God (Morgan Freeman) asks Bruce to pray. He starts with the generic and very"Miss America" prayer of "please feed the children and establish world peace." Everybody wants those items to occur, but if I had one request of God that I was 100% sure would be answered, I think it would be that He reveal himself to the world in the same way he revealed himself to the Israelites during Moses' time. Atheist's couldn't stare head-long into a pillar of fire at night and say "God doesn't exist." Evolutionist's would probably bow out gracefully, admitting that "maybe they were wrong." Politicians would get a better understanding that what they do is insignificant if not guided by Him.
Yet, I don't think that God would reveal Himself again in a pillar of fire, not that He couldn't, but because that's not how He works. Instead He dwells within each of us, and reveals Himself to us and through us individually. That being said, my prayer should actually align itself more with Gandhi, who said: "You must be the change you wish to see in the world." Therefore, if I could ask God for one thing, that He would definitely grant, it would be " God let other people see You through me."

Exercising The Demon

2009-03-09T20:41:00.000-07:00

I laughed at the thought of this title, when I was thinking of a good blogpost about my newly decorated guitar. Yes, I was exercising the guitar, not exorcising it. This is my Peavey Tracer, with two stock single coil pickups and a Seymour Duncan "Screamin' Demon" humbucker pickup. It hasn't been out of the house in several years, and I figured that it was about time to dust off the cobwebs , cover-up the ding in the paint with a strategically placed "Rock On" symbol and see what she can do.

Owning a sticker plotter and having a little bit of expendable time can be a dangerouse thing. I currently make dye-cut stickers for customers, so I figured it was time to do a little... advertising (Does that mean that I can write off guitars as a business expense? If so, we're going to Guitar Center.). So on the front of the guitar, I have "Rock On", "jaypalm", and "Insert Pick Here." I have few more stickers planned, including a Papal Cross (like my necklace), and a sticker for the back that says "If you can read this, tell me to turn the guitar over."

I'll Admit It... I'm Hooked

2009-02-17T20:43:00.000-08:00

For Christmas I received an iPod Touch this year. Never in a million years would I have thought that this would be the world's coolest toy. I've downloaded applications which make my day more interesting, like Facebook and Twitter, and I can check my e-mail and the weather, before leaving the house everyday, and all of this with the wi-fi in my house and office. Of course, there are a few apps that provide hours of entertainment, especially for the easily amused... like me. Although I'm a guitarist, I have to say that I am hooked on the "i-ano" (like piano). Here is a great example of what bored people with ipods are doing these days:

2009-02-08T20:23:00.000-08:00

I was tagged by Pete for this Exercise in Musical Exploration. From the depths of my ipod Touch, we'll delve into my music psyche.

Let's see what your music has to say about me...

Here are the rules:
1. Put your iTunes on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS

Let's begin...

1) IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY? You Are So Beautiful -- Joe Cocker
2) WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY? O Holy Night --Mercy Me
3) WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? Freewill - Rush
4) HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY? Indescribable -- Chris Tomlin
5) WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE? Forever - Chris Tomlin
6) WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO? Beverly Hills -- Weezer
7) WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? Salvation Is Here -- Steve Fee
8) WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN? How Great Is Our God - Chris Tomlin
10) WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND? Les Is More - Brad Paisley
11) WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE? I Can't Drive 55 - Sammy Hagar
12) WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY? Vertigo -- U2
13) WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP? Fortunate Son -- C C R
14) WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE? How Great Thou Art -- Phil Wickham
15) WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING? Land of Confusion - Disturbed
16) WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL? Turf's Up -- Brad Paisley
17) WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST? Red Barchetta -- Rush
18) WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET? Free Fallin' -- John Mayer
19) WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS? Over My Head -- Fray
20) WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN? Who'll Stop The Rain - CCR
21) HOW WILL YOU DIE? Rich Girl - Gwen Stefani ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
22) WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET? Disease - Matchbox 20
23) WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH? Every Breath You Take (The Stalker Song) -The Police
24) WHAT MAKES YOU CRY? Crossfire - Stevie Ray Vaughn (I Miss You Stevie...)
25) WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED? Elevation - U2
26) WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST? Kerosene - Miranda Lambert
27) DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU? American Idiot -- Green Day
28) IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE? Always Forever - Phil Wickham
29) WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW? Walking on the Moon -- The Police
30) WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS NOTE AS? Better Days -- GooGoo Dolls

Online

2009-01-30T18:00:00.000-08:00

I plan on entering the world of Facebook here in the near future (because everyone is doing it... so I should too). Even though its not as "Teeny-bopper" as MySpace, this video came to mind. I enjoy country music, and Brad Paisley is an amazing guitarist. Enjoy!

PS - I'll let you know when my Facebook is up!

PPS - The embeding feature is disabled, so I can only copy the URL.

Brad Paisley -- "Online"

Good Times, Good Times

2009-01-28T20:36:00.000-08:00

I was stoked tonight when I turned the television on, to find that the original Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory was on ABC Family. I have to say that I still laugh at some of the lines, even though I've seen that version of the movie a dozen times. Here a couple that made me laugh. If you read these and can picture what part of the movie they are from, you get bonus points.

"If she's a lady, then I'm a Vermicious Kunid."
"The snozberries taste like snozberries"
"She must have been a bad egg"
"No... Don't ... Stop..."
"Button, button, who's got the button" (Kimbasa, that's for you)

Wii Fat

2009-01-10T20:47:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year! I have spent the first ten days of the year, attempting to live up to my aspirations for 2009. The first on the list involves getting back into shape (a shape besides round). In a feeble attempt to start, I have begun using the WiiFit Program for 4 days a week. This coupled with eating better and a few legitimate workouts, and I'm looking like my pre-festively- plump self!
Starting the game was a more than a wii-little disconcerting. When you first step on the balance board, the game makes a sound that resembles 'oh', and the only thing that could make you feel more self-conscious is if it started-in with a 'your momma's so fat...' joke. (I find it ironic that after years of telling people that video games cause children to be overweight, we now have a video game that essentially calls you fat to your face.) If that wasn't humiliating enough, it takes your Mii (your personalized Wii character), and bulges out the mid-section, if you are not of a petite size. So now, I am determined to bring my Mii back to its normal size and show this game who's boss. My goal is twenty pounds in six months, and I figure if I stop eating now, I might just make it.

Christmas Was Here

2008-12-26T21:11:00.000-08:00

Here we are on December 26th, and it seems as only yesterday we were celebrating Easter... Memorial Day... Labor Day... Thanksgiving. It seems this year has been barreling along, like the Polar Express headed down a slippery slope, ending in 2009. Could it be that Christmas has come and gone again? I think that Jewish people have it right -- we need eight nights of celebration. I'm in favor of December 24th through the 31st. The only issue would be that if I ate for eight days like I did on Christmas, it would take me until Independence Day to work off the weight.
This year, we had a Palmer first. We woke up Christmas morning in our house. Since Nik and I got married, we have always split our Christmas days between our parents' houses in Tucson. This year we had the rare opportunity to celebrate on the weekend before Christmas with Nik's family, and on Christmas day with my family... In Phoenix. We ate; we opened presents; we ate; we played games; and we ate again. It was like the most perfect of days. Here are some pics:

Happy Birthday Mom!

2008-12-11T06:00:00.000-08:00

Happy Anniversary of Your 29th Birthday Mom! Drew has a special birthday diaper with your name on it.

Things I'm Thankful For , Part4

2008-12-04T10:45:00.000-08:00

My beautiful wife has graciously read all of my other "Things I'm Thankful For," and never asked me why I haven't mentioned her (even in the 'family' post). Well, here is her moment in the limelight.
I met Nik eleven years ago on the volleyball court at Grand Canyon Univ. and after convincing her to break up with her current "boyfriend", I was able to talk her into going to the Winter formal with me (eleven years ago, almost to the day). In fact, while we were decorating the Christmas tree last week, I pulled out a blue bulb that we had gotten at the formal. It was funny to think that we have a hundred ornate ornaments on the tree, but that is probably one of the most special to me because of the wonderful memory that accompanies it. We married on May 20, 2000 and we are now the proud parents of a three month old.
Nikki is the most amazing wife and mother that I could ever ask for. She has a capacity for love and patience that runs deeper than I could ever hope to have for myself. Her handling of running a preschool, taking care of a baby, and still having time and energy to love me is a gift that few people possess.
I can't wait to continue doing all the crazy things we did before Septmber, but now we get to include our little Sweet Pea in our adventures. Love ya Baby!

Great Quotes

2008-12-04T10:19:00.000-08:00

While going through my desk at lunch today, I found this priceless Quote:

In an interview after 9/11, General Norman Schwartzkopf was asked if he didn't think there was any room for forgiveness toward the people who have harbored and abetted the terrorists who penetrated in the attacks on American. His answer was classic...

" I believe that forgiving them is God's function. Our job is to arrange the meeting."

Things I'm Thankful For , Part 3

2008-12-01T21:00:00.000-08:00

I know Thanksgiving is past, but I didn't have time to do a post on Wednesday or Thursday. So originally I was going to be thankful for family... but I've had too much of them. Here are my brother Shaun and his lovely wife Natalie; My Mom and Dad; and Mini-Me.

Things I'm Thankful For , Part 2

2008-11-26T04:48:00.000-08:00

FRIENDS... No, not the TV show. I am astounded by the number of people that Nik and I list as friends. When we sat down to send out birth announcements for Drew, we blew through 75 without even nearing the bottom of the list. How amazing is that? God has put so many great people in our lives that listing them individually would take up too much space on the Blog server and would probably crash the internet. Since I don't want to do that, I'll just say how much I appreciate each of you, and I am so glad that you are in my life.

PS- I do like the tv show Friends... just to be clear.

Things I'm Thankful For , Part 1

2008-11-24T20:44:00.000-08:00

On September 4th, Andrew Ryan Palmer entered the world. Although eleven weeks of drama has persued and permeated every level of our lives, our "Manly King" opened my eyes to the capacity I could have for love and compassion. He was born seventeen days early, and although Nik and I weren't "ready" for him, we wouldn't have had him any other way. Today, besides going to the doctor to find out that his eyesight was fine, he started watching me. He stared at me when I was eating dinner, and he continued through playtime. It's almost as though he is as intrigued with me as I am with him.

Words could not express how thankful I am for him and his health!

It's Like Being in London at Night!

2008-11-20T19:34:00.000-08:00

Even though it wasn't completely done, I took Drew in his room to see his star ceiling (phase 1). He was laying in bed stirring around, unable to sleep, so I picked him up and brought him into his room. The ceiling went up on Sunday afternoon, and I wrapped up most of the major work on Sunday night, but I have more that I want to do to it. I put off going into the room with Drew (See my last post) because of fear of him not being able to see it, or even acknowledging it. My fears quickly subsided as his mouth dropped and stayed wide open. After a few minutes of barely blinking, I moved toward the door, and his little body twisted around me, trying to see each of the stars until we moved around the corner. I'm sure he saw it. Now I just want the Doctor to confirm it at our appointment on Monday. We feel he is making progress, and nothing would make us happier than to find out that everything is fine.

PS - It's not quite done, but I am super excited to see Drew's room coming along. The bulk of the star ceiling is up and London looks good enough to fly into! Michael Gray put hours of work into making Drew's room a special place for him. You're the Man Mikey!

A Star Ceiling for A Blind Child

2008-11-10T20:59:00.000-08:00

Nik and I stood in the Doctor's office mortified by what we were seeing. As our pediatrician shone the light in our baby's eyes, he didn't blink or turn away. He waved the instrument back-and-forth and then dipped the light within an inch of his eye, and still there was no response. We waited for an encouraging word, or an anecdotal story of how this was common in baby boys, but instead we were instructed to make an appointment with a pediatric optomologist. That news was more daunting than the procession of four vaccines that followed.
We left the doctor's office, not sure of what to say to each other. Could it be true that our son couldn't see us? Is that why he hadn't smiled at us yet? A million questions and situations raced through my mind on the way home, and I had a hard time grasping at the fact that our child could be blind.
Of course the easiest thing to do was to think of everything he wouldn't be able to do- sports, driving, and enjoying the vibrant colors God made. Then a very simple, yet chilling, realization came to me -- what about the star ceiling that I have been working on for the past few months? Months before he was born we dreamed of our little man having a Peter Pan themed room, complete with a mural of London and a star ceiling for him to stare at while he goes to bed. The thought of him not being able to see this gift was almost too much to bear.
That night, as Nik read him his bedtime story, I held Drew close and fought back emotion, as best I could. In the end, the thought that my genes could have caused this was too much. How could this happen to my baby, especially after all of the trauma he had been through during the first few weeks of his life?
The next day I felt sick with emotion. Just the thought of something being wrong with Drew made my stomach ache. As the end of the workday neared, Nik and I spoke on the phone, and she reassured me that everything would be alright (a Mother's instinct), and then she commented on something I hadn't thought of. Drew has a light in his eyes, that he wouldn't have if he were blind. Although this didn't give an answer for the problem, it did give me hope that the situation was probably not as bleak as it originally seemed. We are still waiting for a call from the optomologist, but we have hope that we will have some resolve soon. We feel that we see progress everyday, and we hope that someday we'll find that his vision is just a little behind where it should be.

PS -- Drew,
Daddy will have your stars up this weekend. I can't wait for you to see them!

Change... You Can Keep

2008-11-05T21:40:00.000-08:00

The next President of the United States (after Barak) will be able to run on a campaign that entitles you to keep the money you make. Until then, as a nation we will agree to keep whatever change (dollars and cents) the government will let us keep.

Economic Disfunction... Yes, we can!

Just Do It

2008-10-28T21:50:00.000-07:00

We're one week away from an election that will change the history of this nation forever. Horrible governmental decisions are being made, and we're adding zeroes to the back of our national debt faster than you can say ' Dave Ramsey.' In light of current events, I'm very afraid of a socialist stepping in and taking control of the White House... and my money.
I have had the opportunity to share my opinion about the election and I feel that I have drawn several poignant conclusions about who I am going to vote for. What I am finding is that the more people I speak with, the more people share my opinion. The problem is... (wait for it)... THEY'RE NOT REGISTERED TO VOTE! We live in a democracy, but we're allowing other's votes to be more important than ours. No matter what side of the issues you are on, GET OUT AND VOTE!

The Truth of Twain: PT1

2008-10-19T12:39:00.000-07:00

Since my last blog, I heard a few more priceless sayings from Mark Twain that I thought was worth sharing. Here are a few to think about:

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable. (9 out of 10 people believe this)

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it.

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly American criminal class except Congress.

Government Bailout-(It's Good to be AIG)

2008-10-10T12:48:00.000-07:00

I have no love for any of our politicians. After this bailout of big business, I understand Mark Twain who said "that politicians and diapers should be changed often, and usually for the same reason." Since many can't comprehend 700 trillion dollars, let's break it down into a smaller number... how about $700,000 x 1 Million. Sounds like a great idea, right. Throwing money at a problem doesn't make it go away. In fact, the accompanying story is how AIG helped spend some of the $85 billion that they were given to bail them out of financial crisis. I hate to wish ill on someone, but I hope the government sues the AIG execs into oblivion.

AIG execs' spa retreat

Hey, AIG execs, you just got an $85 billion bailout from the government to help rescue your company. What are you going to do to relax, unwind, breathe that sigh of relief?

How about a trip to this luxurious spa?

Turns out, that's what they did. Ever since this financial crisis hit, economic terms like "dead cat bounce" are as popular in search as celebrities.But reports that AIG's executives spent roughly $440,000 for rooms, banquets and spa services really got Web searchers looking for more.
Previous to the AIG trip, the Bora Bora St. Regis resort was the chain's most famous. It's where Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban had their honeymoon. But now all eyes are on the St. Regis in California, where the AIG execs lived it up. And since it charges $350 a pop for massages, no wonder the tab added up quickly. For a little perspective, the money these folks spent on just the banquets (about $147,000) is more than twice the median household income of Maryland, the highest-earning state in the country. And that's not even counting the costs they incurred at the resort's Vogue Salon.

How can you not be mad about such excess? Some CEOs are feeling our ire directly, like this CEO, who was punched in the face at the gym and knocked out cold.
Maybe he can find peace on his indoor squash court in his 20-room mansion. (Compare that to the current home of this financial wizard — a home bought in 1958 for just $31,500.)

Something I've Learned Since Becoming A Parent:

2008-09-23T22:09:00.001-07:00

Before touring Baby's R Us, I thought a nipple shield was merely something that happened during a Superbowl wardrobe malfunction. Who knew?
(SORRY NO PICTURES ON THIS POST)

A Growing Epedemic

2008-09-21T22:29:00.000-07:00

As I was reading this, I thought I would hilite the parts that I found interesting. I just thought I was changing poopy diapers... who knew?

Disposable Diaper Statistics

Disposable diaper statistics can stagger the mind, particularly when viewed in the context of the history of child rearing. The modern infant can expect to go through nearly five thousand diaper changes, according to conservative estimates. (Other reputable sources put the number at closer to 11,000.) For comparison, consider that parents in the pre-disposable diaper era often changed their infants’ diapers only a handful of times over years. In fact, as foreign as this idea sounds, some parents actually used to “pass down” diapers from sibling to sibling to save money during hard times.

Experts in disposable diaper statistics estimate the number of diapers disposed in U.S. landfills alone at more than 21 billion annually. Health officials warn that this number should only increase, given current toilet training trends, which suggest that parents are waiting longer and longer to wean their toddlers off their diapers. The sheer volume of disposable diapers in landfills presents a slate of logistical and environmental challenges. The degradation of the plastics used in many disposable diapers can take half a millennium. Moreover, the chlorinated byproducts of such degradation can leech into soils and create hazards to public water supplies. When you consider these disposable diaper statistics alongside the fact that the U.S. public spends nearly half a billion dollars annually on disposables, it’s easy to see why so many interest groups have aligned against these products.

All this said, however, it’s imperative to view disposable diaper statistics with an open mind. While disposing plastics in landfills undoubtedly exacts an environmental toll, the rinsing and washing of billions of cloth/reusable diapers would likewise create major strains on public sewage systems. Also, bear in mind that the convenience of quick-changing infants frees up worker resources, which theoretically could be harnessed for pro-environment initiatives.

This posting is from:

http://www.hamptonsdiapers.com/disposable-diaper-statistics.html

Okay... So Now What?

2008-09-14T20:26:00.000-07:00

It's hard to believe that Drew is 10 days old today, and I am still just mesmerized by how amazing this little Dude is. So far we haven't had much time to be together because I'm in the busiest part of my year at work, and when I'm home, I don't think I could spend enough time holding and kissing the little guy. Yet I beg the question, what's next? Not that I'm not caught up in this moment, but I haven't been around enough babies to know what to expect. I know we have the losing of the umbilical cord, the circumcision, and all the doctors appointments that newborns have, but I have no idea in what order to expect them to happen. I guess that's just the beauty of life. As a side note here is the new site dedicated to my baby Drew.

Homeward Bound

2008-09-10T16:24:00.000-07:00

We're bringing the Drew-man home this morning!

Hiccup

2008-09-09T20:13:00.000-07:00

Nik and I checked into ER last night with Drew. He has High Risk Jaundice and is testing higher than our pediatrician would like to see. We checked in about 11:00 last night, and they got us into a room, and Drew under the photo-lights about 1:00am. If you follow the link above, you can read about jaundice, the liver, and bilirubin. On the scale that is used for the blood test for jaundice, a doctor would like to see a number under 11 to feel confident that a newborn's liver will begin to operate and destroy the bilirubins in his system. They begin to get concerned at about 17 and by 20 they begin treatment. Drew tested at a 19.7 yesterday, and because he was born 2 1/2 weeks early, he needs special UV treatment to reduce the bili in his system. After spending last night under the lights, Drew's number came down to 15 when he was tested this morning. With progress like that, they thought we would be going home this afternoon... but it wasn't to be. Drew tested at 14.2, which is below the 11 the doctor would like to see to comfortably release him. That being said, Nik, Drew, and I will be spending another night in the hospital, and what's worse about the whole process is having to put our little guy under the UV "tanning bed", where we're not able to hold him except to feed him. We are praying that tomorrow morning the test will come back favorably.
Thank you to everyone who has called, texted, visited, and most importantly prayed as we go through this trial. We are confident that this will be over soon, and our Sweet Pea will be healthy.

Introducing Andrew Ryan Palmer

2008-09-07T22:03:00.000-07:00

Looking back at my last post... I am reminded that God has a sense of humor.

Drew was born September 4th at 5:50am. He's 7lbs 8ozs. and 20.5" long. Nik and I are at home now, and are doing well. Nik is adjusting well to her new role as Mommy and is just a natural when it comes to being the provider and nurturer of the Drew-man. We love him so much! Enjoy the pics!

Last Date

2008-09-02T20:44:00.000-07:00

It seems like only yesterday, we were excited about being 30 days away, and how it would be an eternity before Drew arrives. Now it feels like we're full-steam ahead toward September 20th, and it doesn't look like we're slowing down. Nik and I went out this afternoon to a movie, dinner, and then shopping for "hospital stuff." We reminisced about our eight years of marriage and how we wouldn't have wanted children any sooner (they would have cramped our style). Now we're staring down the last few days before the Drew-man graces us with his presence and changes our lives forever! We were both a little sad to think that this could be our last pre-baby date. We enjoyed the time out and went to see the movie Hancock and ate appetizers at Friday's.Note: Drew likes Jalepeno Poppers!
Tomorrow we go to the doctor to see how things are progressing, and if we have any better idea of when Drew will be here. Until then, I check the camera batteries once a week; make sure the house is clean... and then remember about a million things that I really should have done before Drew comes home. Just thinking of all those projects is making me tired.

Birthing Humor

2008-08-26T22:21:00.000-07:00

Nik and I went to our final of four birthing classes tonight in downtown Phoenix. Our teacher was a labor & delivery nurse, who has five children of her own. What was more amazing was the fact that she had some naturally, some with pain management, a C-Section, and then two "natural" births after a C-Section. In other words... Been there... Done that... Bought the T-shirt.
Our class had about eight couples, ranging from a few high schoolers through late 30-somethings, and there were a plethora of questions , most of which coming from first-time moms. There were several facts that I won't share openly (younger eyes may be reading this), but there is one that I found quite comical that I would like to share.
After beginning breastfeeding, the woman's body becomes attuned to the sound of a baby's cry, and it is quite common for a woman's body to begin pumping milk out at the sound of an infant crying (not necessarily her own infant). This brings new meaning to "crying over spilled milk", or "spilling milk over crying." I guess you have to be prepared for that grocery store visit, when you'r in the chip aisle and a baby starts whimpering four aisles away. "Clean-up in aisle six." Be prepared... that's all I'm saying.

Workout Mix August 08

2008-08-20T21:44:00.000-07:00

I've been too busy to go to the gym on a regular basis, but here's my mix:

1. Me & My Bobby McGee -Janis Joplin (Warm-up / Stretch)
2. Hiphopapotomus vs. Rhymenocerus - Flight of the Conchords
3. Move Along - The All American Rejects
4. Land of Confusion - Disturbed
5. Here is Our King - David Crowder
6. Cult of Personality - Living Color
7. The Boys of Summer - The Ataris
8. Immigrant Song - Led Zeppelin
9. Hey Man, Nice Shot - Filter (This song may become a blog topic)
10. A Little Less Conversation - Elvis Remix

I don't have time to link to all these songs, sorry!

Full Speed Ahead

2008-08-18T21:36:00.000-07:00

Crazy day today! Here's a quick recap:

Started the day at the hospital... false alarm, Drew's not quite ready.
Had our Doctor's appointment... We got to see our boy in all his glory
He has positioned himself for birth... even though we have awhile.
We got to catch up with some old friends over dinner. Paradise Bakery Rules!
The stem is still on the apple... and I have the picture to prove it. (I'll post it tomorrow)

Words To Live By : Volume 2

2008-08-17T22:25:00.000-07:00

“A person is not given integrity. It results from the relentless pursuit of honesty at all times.”

Nuff Sed

35 Down, 5 to Go

2008-08-16T13:32:00.000-07:00

One week until full term!!! I have no idea where this year has gone, and I can't seem to slow time down at all as we get closer to the day the Drew-man arrives. With that in mind, I am super-excited about the next five weeks of our lives. We're halfway through birthing classes, and we begin our weekly doctors appointments next week. On Monday we have our first ultrasound since week 18 and I can't wait to be able to see and hear my little man. Yet, I was a little concerned at our last doctor appointment when our doc jokingly said that the ultrasound was to check on the progress of the baby... and to make sure that the stem was still on the apple (wink, wink, nudge, nudge), if you know what I mean. I am still confident that we're having a boy, but as a "Type A" personality, I don't like to think that all of our plans may have to change.
I don't know how Nik is surviving the summer. If it weren't for the pool and good air conditioning, I think we would be in trouble. Here's how Nik and Drew look after 35 weeks... Absolutely Gorgeous!

I.O.W.A.

2008-08-11T21:19:00.000-07:00

I had a friend back in college that was from the state of Iowa and we always used to tease her that her state was an acronym that meant "I Owe the World an Apology" or "Idiots Out Walking Around." Now according to one New York story, the idiots are migrating to a crosswalk near you. I heard a report the other day regarding the number of deaths per year due to people on cell phones crossing the street and being struck by an oncoming car, and the numbers were shocking. Here is an excerpt from WNBC in New York:

NEW YORK -- A state senator from Brooklyn said on Tuesday he plans to introduce legislation that would ban people from using an MP3 player, cell phone, Blackberry or any other electronic device while crossing the street in New York City and Buffalo.

NewsChannel 4 reported that Sen. Carl Kruger is proposing the ban in response to two recent pedestrian deaths in his district, including a 23-year-old man who was struck and killed last month while listening to his iPod on Avenue T and East 71st Street In Bergen Beach.

"While people are tuning into their iPods and cell phones, they're tuning out the world around them," Kruger said. The proposed law would make talking on cell phones while crossing the street a comparable offense to jaywalking.

Luckily, Phoenix's summers prevent many people from walking the streets. This should mean our casualty rate should diminish between May and September. so next time you think to complain how hot it is in Phoenix, just remember that heat and a poor public transit system could be keeping you in a car, and out of the dangerous crosswalk.

Words to Live By: Volume 1

2008-08-10T22:27:00.000-07:00

You streak it... You scrub it.
This treasure was heard uttered at la casa de Hoskins. Some may say this is potty humor... Those people would be right.

Monitor Madness

2008-08-10T21:51:00.000-07:00

Irony: Poignantly contrary to what was expected or intended.

This week at church we talked about chaos and how it interferes with having peace in our lives. So when a church speaks about chaos, the assumption is that everything behind the scenes is kosher. Well, this week behind-the-scenes was fine, but the lead guitarist couldn't get his act together on stage.
No matter what I did, I fought with the monitors all weekend, to the point that I wanted to jump-off the stage and just listen to myself in the speakers without my monitors in. Let's visit the tragic comedy that I performed this weekend.

Saturday 5:00pm- I forgot to plug my in-ear monitors in before starting the first song, which is an instrumental solo that I lead. Then after the solo was over, I plug in my monitor only to find that the cord is wrapped around my guitar stand...twice. After a moment of sheer terror, I was able to snake the cord off of one part of the stand. Then after seeing my struggle, our bass player, Tom, was able to knock the cord from around the other part of the stand, freeing me to move againd.

Sunday 8:30am- I was really digging the groove we had going on "Marvelous Light" and I was moving more than a corded-musician should. All of a sudden, I felt a sharp snap and realized that I stepped on my cord and unplugged my monitor. Trying to keep my cool, I waited until the song was over and replugged. Of course that meant that I was late in playing during a transition that I was supposed to play.

Sunday 11:30am-During this service, the message is translated into Spanish for our hispanic crowd. Right as we started the first song, they were testing their microphones, which feed into our in-ear monitors. Since I hadn't had to think about the channel they were using during the other 4 services, I neglected to turn that channel down before service, which was a mistake that I will never make again. That being said, during the opening intro and first song, all I kept hearing in my ear was "test, testing, test."

A Rose By Any Other Name...

2008-07-28T22:16:00.000-07:00

Everyone probably knows what their name means and they may even know the reason their parents chose their name . Whether through random selection, or through meaning, our names bring value and demonstrate a sense of uniqueness. For instance, we are naming our son Andrew Ryan, which means 'Manly King'. How stinking awesome is that (This kid is destined for success)! Unfortunately, not everyone has a passion for choosing names that glorify their child. The following story was taken from a UK paper in regards to what is going on overseas...sorta.

Parents banned from calling child 'Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii'

Thursday, July 24, 2008

How talented the girl was at hula is unknown

A New Zealand judge has chastised two parents for calling their 9-year-old girl Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii. Family Court Judge Rob Murfitt cited a list of unfortunate names that he said were embarrassing or made children seem foolish among their peers.
Some names, including Fish and Chips, Yeah Detroit, Stallion, Twisty Poi, Keenan Got Lucy and Sex Fruit, were blocked by registration officials, he said.

But others were allowed, including Number 16 Bus Shelter, Benson and Hedges (twins), Midnight Chardonnay, Hitler, Cinderella Beauty Blossom "and tragically, Violence," the judge said.

The names were mentioned in Murfitt's decision on a custody battle over the 9-year-old girl from the North Island town of Hawera, who was so embarrassed at the name her parents had given her - Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii - that she never told her closest friends what it was. She told people her name was "K" because she feared being "mocked and teased," the girl's lawyer, Colleen MacLeod, told the court.

"The court is profoundly concerned about the very poor judgment which this child's parents have shown in choosing this name," Murfitt wrote. "It makes a fool of the child and sets her up with a social disability and handicap, unnecessarily."

Murfitt ordered that the court take custody of her until the name could be formally changed, which has since occurred and the custody dispute settled, Family Court Manager Midge Shaw said Thursday.

The new name was not made public to protect the girl's privacy.

Brian Clarke, the registrar general of Births, Deaths and Marriages, said New Zealand law does not allow names that would cause offense to a reasonable person, that are 100 characters or more long, that include titles or military rank or that include punctuation marks or numerals.

He said officials usually talked to parents who proposed unusual names to convince them about the potential for embarrassment.

"Often when we explain the situation to parents we can agree on an acceptable name to register," he said.

And On the Eighth Day God Created Morons.

2008-07-08T21:34:00.000-07:00

Reading great literature was never an important part of my high school career. I would do well on my tests, and I always turned in assignments on time, but if it wasn't for the Cliffs Notes on all the great literary works, I would have struggled. My English teacher used to get excited when I would bring clever banter to the classroom about Hemmingway or Shakespeare, and provide insights on the underlying message of a novel. In short, I may not have read the whole book, but at least my efforts made me a better, more learned person. Sure, we all would laugh and snicker when someone would bring up, "but when will we ever use this is everyday life?" Yet, there was something to be said about how the experiences of literary figures could help mold our world views and give us a better understanding of the capacity of man's intellect and abilities. I say all that, to be able to say... The gentlemen in this picture were absent on the day God handed-out brains. And yes... I know what you're thinking... Is that a power strip floating on a pair of flip-flops? To which of course I answer... Pete and Repeat are in a boat... Pete falls out, who's left?

The history of moronic behavior is bound to repeat itself... if they make it out of the pool.

No Petes were harmed during the making of this blog.

And I Thought I Was A Multi-Tasker

2008-06-25T10:46:00.000-07:00

My wife would probably laugh and agree with me when I say "I'm a little slow." I had no idea that you could do more than just drive from the driver's seat of a moving vehicle. I've heard the stories, read the statistics, and watched the videos on Youtube, but I had no idea that Arizona drivers were really that bad. I spend a good bit of time behind the wheel everyday, and the past week I've been intrigued to watch other drivers as they sit in traffic. I watch people text message, shave (not just guys), read books and magazines, and even watch television, but yesterday I saw something that took the cake. I was going through McDonald's drive-thru (getting a Vanilla Iced Coffee), and saw a young girl driving in her car and reading the Bible. I am a firm advocate of doing a daily devotional, but behind the wheel of a car may be a bit much. I suppose if she hits another car, while doing her devotions, it could be deemed the Christian equivalent of declaring Jihad on the "Motorist-Infidel." Maybe if we all put down the distractions while we drive, we could all reach our destinations sooner. This has been a public service announcement from a concerned driver. Thank you for listening.

More Enjoyment

2008-06-22T21:51:00.000-07:00

Beware my friend... Beware.

Enjoy

2008-06-18T18:08:00.000-07:00

Sometimes You Need to Remember the Finer Things In Life!

Belly Bud-don

2008-06-13T22:19:00.000-07:00

As Nikki enters Week 26 of pregnancy, we have noticed that her belly button has formed an area that is perfect for an earbud. Therefore, I feel this is God letting me know that Drew is ready for some good tunes. So here is the first list of songs that I want to play for Drew, while still in the womb.

BABY JAMS I :
1. No Such Thing -- John Mayer
2. Savior King -- Hillsong United
3. You & Me -- Lifehouse
4. Divine Romance -- Phil Wickham
5. Message In a Bottle -- Police
6. Where the Streets Have No Name -- U2
7. Little Wonders -- Rob Thomas
8. 100 Years -- 5 for Fighting
9. Desperado -- The Eagles
10. So Much To Say -- Dave Matthews Band

PS -- I want my child well-educated on music that rocks... I would love suggestions for Baby Jams II.

The End of An Era

2008-06-12T22:30:00.000-07:00

Five years and fifteen trips ago, Nik and I became Annual Passholders at Disneyland. It was then that we realized that we would be doomed to be children for the rest of our lives. We still get a rush going down Main Street for the first time on a trip; we enjoy eating at the Blue Bayou; and I typically choke back a tear during the fireworks show. This time was bittersweet, though, because we spent our days dreaming of the day when we would be able to take our kids to Disneyland, but lamenting the idea of giving-up our couples' time at the Happiest Place on Earth. As of July 24th, our Annual Passes run-out and we say goodbye to the end an era (Cue sad, remorseful music).
Walking out of the Park this time, felt like saying goodbye to an old friend.

It truly is a world of laughter, a world of tears, a world of hope, and a world of cheer. There's so much that we share that it's time we are aware... it's a small world after all!

How I destroyed America

2008-06-12T22:20:00.000-07:00

Typically I believe in keeping blogs light-hearted, but I was challenged by something on talk radio on Friday. The topic was "What Am I Proud of?", probably referring partially to a recent comment by the wife of a presidential candidate who stated that she hasn't been proud of America, until now. In keeping with that train of thought, I was intrigued by how the talk-show host stated the institutions of America that we took great pride in during the 60's and 70's, that have now been undermined and compromised today. Americans have a fascination with conspiracy theories and a tendency to believe everything they see or hear in the media today (they couldn't say it in mass media if it wasn't true... right?). We refuse to stand behind anything, because everything has been tainted by one or more people/situations that have gone wrong. Think about just a few things that were important back then, that have been marginalized today:

Are you proud of...

Corporate America: No, big business is about the rich getting richer and me getting poorer.

Public Schools: No, teachers are sleeping with students and the quality of education is abismal.

The Oil Companies: No. They polute our environment, and they hold the key to saving the environment through new types of fuel, but they'll never do anything about it, because they are too busy making money hand-over-fist.

The Military: No, they kill innocent women and children and destroy families.

The Government: No, they lie to us and do everything for personal gain.

Religion: No, priests are molesting children and televangelists use the money they collect to buy things like boats and houses.

WHY ARE THE EXCEPTIONS BECOMING THE RULE?

I am proud of America. If I ever instilled doubt about any of the aforementioned establishments in America, than I am sorry. This topic was a real "wake-up call" for me, so that I would stop acting like the local newscasters (who are doom-and-gloom conspiracy theorists) and more like a proud citizen of the best nation in the world!

Tag... I'm It

2008-06-09T21:57:00.001-07:00

After being tagged by Pete and Ian... here are my answers for these categories:

Four jobs I've had:
1. Basketball Instructor -- Tucson Parks and Rec
2. City Manager -- Front Row USA (I was in charge of handling the credit card promos for the Dbacks, Suns, and Rattlers.)
3. Director of Operations-- Aero Rental (The job I've been at since October of 1999.
4. Business Owner -- Impact Marketing & Media and Rentalstickers.com (Coming soon)

Four movies I've watched more than once:
1. Monty Python & The Holy Grail-- I wore this one out on VHS.
2. So I Married An Axe Murderer -- Can you say classic?
3. Spinal Tap -- The best Mach-umentary ever made.
4. Aladin -- Disney at its best.

Four places I've lived:
1. Tucson, AZ
2. Phoenix, AZ
3. Avondale, AZ
4. Denial

Four TV shows I watch:
1. Friends -- I think this show defined my generation
2. Seinfeld -- Comic genius
3. 24 -- I love the twists and turns that can happen in 24 hours
4. Scrubs -- NBC dropped them, but ABC is picking them up for one more season. Woohoo!

Four places I've been:
1. Mount Rushmore -- College Roommate was married in South Dakota
2. Disneyland -- About three times a year
3. Chicago -- Beautiful city
4. Napa Valley / San Fransisco- the whole Bay area and North are awesome

Four people who email me regularly:
1. Aaron Campbell
2. Mike Bullock
3. Nikki Palmer
4. My Mom

Four of my favorite foods:
1. Pizza-- Any kind will work
2. Nachos -- Disneyland or My Wife's Recipe
3. Panda Express (Anything on the menu)
4. McDonald's Vanilla Iced Coffee

Four places I would love to visit:
1. Egypt -- I want to see the pyramids before I die
2. "The Holy Land"-- Our church is taking a trip there in December, and if it was any other
year, we would totally go... but we can't bring a two month old
3. Disney World, FL -- I've heard the hype, but I have to see if it's as good as the original
4. New York -- More specifically I would like to see Rockefeller square when it is lit up for Christmas.

Four things I'm looking forward to in the coming year:
1. The birth of my son.
2. Finding out how much sleep I can live without.
3. Getting my businesses rolling and becoming solvent.
4. Finishing a one year study of the Bible

Four friends I'm tagging: (It's your turn for the limelight)
1. Shaun Palmer
2. Natalie Palmer
3. Michael Gray
4. Heidi Gray

The Longest Yard

2008-06-01T20:37:00.000-07:00

Our friends Michael and Heidi have been waiting a long time to become parents, and barring no setbacks, tomorrow morning they will be the proud parents of Harrison Michael Gray. After a relatively short, unexpected adoption process, they were chosen by a young lady in Salt Lake City to be the mother of the child she gave birth to this morning. In Utah, the mother is given 24 hours to change her mind in the adoption process, and we're approaching the half way point. It's impossible to understand what they're feeling, because I know that Nik and I are almost sick to our stomaches with anticipation. I think it will be hard to sleep tonight, and the anticipation of great news tomorrow is just about more than we take. What the Gray's are going through emotionally right now has to be something that very few people will ever be able to understand. After years of hopes and prayers; peaks and valleys; and the general emotional roller coaster that goes along with their struggles to have children, it would be such an amazing event to have a third person in the Gray family. Let the countdown continue!

PS to the Birth mother: I know you probably don't read my blog... but giving the gift of life into Michael and Heidi's hands would empower this amazing child to become the full man that God would intend him to become. What an incredible gift of life for such a worthy couple!

Global Warming?

2008-05-22T22:13:00.000-07:00

For the past year, I have listened to the rederick that has been thrown-around regarding global warming. I have listened to the mainstream media worship at the altar of Al Gore. I have watched famous icons go out and buy Toyota Prius' and tote the fact that they are reducing their "carbon footprint." Yet now I find myself wondering where Al Gore was today when we dipped into the 60's here in Phoenix at the end of May.

Here are some things to ponder when it comes to global warming:

1. Do I want to turn in my man-card and be caught in a Prius.
2. Do you want to become part of a trendy buzz word. (Didn't we learn something from Pogs, Pet Rocks, leg warmers,and large-poofy bangs.)
3. If scientists who study the earth's patterns can't come to a definitive answer, how can we blindly accept a politician's opinion.
4. It is ironic to me that every time there is a global warming conference, there are record low temperatures somewhere in the world. (It's ironic and it's true)
5. Al Gore can't lose. If our temps in 08 go down, he can gloat that what he said made a difference. If temps go up in 08, it just mean that he can make more million dollars speeches about saving the earth.

As for me, on May 22nd, 2008, I am keeping my carbon footprints inside, because my carbon toes are cold.

WEEK 22: Chuck Norris Recognizes the Pregnancy

2008-05-19T21:35:00.000-07:00

Yes this picture looks like the "Dancing Baby." No you may not start any comments about this blog with "Ooga-chaka" or "I Can't fight this feeling..."
For Mother's Day, I bought Nikki a Dr Seuss book entitled "Oh the Places You'll Go... A Book to be Read in Utero." She lets me read to Drew at nights, and what's funny about reading a Dr Seuss book, is that Drew probably understands some of the Seussian characters' names as much as I do. Either way, we still have fun hoping that my voice will become instilled in his mind. It's crazy to think that we are over half way to her "due date" and it seems like only yesterday that I found out I was going to be a daddy. Could time go any quicker?

The Legend of the Shoeless Guitarist

2008-05-17T21:46:00.000-07:00

Often I am asked about why I don't wear shoes while playing guitar on-stage, and I never realized that people really noticed. So much so, that there have been a few people that go to Palm Valley Church, that I have to introduce myself as: 1. One of the two electric guitarists 2. The guitarist with the green guitar 3. The guitarist who doesn't wear shoes. Crazy huh! What's funnier is that I usually have to get all three statements out before the person recognizes me. Then the question always arises, "Why don't you wear shoes?" Well here are a couple possible answers, I'll let you draw your own conclusions.

1. I'm not particularly keen on shoe wearing.
2. It's easier to push the buttons on my effects processor without shoes.
3. Since I am playing at church (usually), I am trying to be reverant to the concept of "Holy Ground".
4. My wife owns too many shoes, therefore the budget is shot for me owning nice shoes.
5. After hearing the fable of the Old Lady and the Shoe, when I was younger, I was concerned of stepping on one of the many children.
6. Chuck Norris says that shoes are a sign of weakness.

Drew is -20 weeks old.

2008-05-06T22:12:00.001-07:00

I think time in the womb should be considered in B.B. and A.B. (Instead of B.C. and A.D.). Therefore our Baby is 20 Weeks BB (Before Birth). September is coming fast, and we have a gadgillion books to read and philosophies to look into, and I'm thinking that I should get the nursery done sometime in the middle of all that craziness. We do have a plan for the nursery. We are planning a Peter Pan theme, and we have some special twists that we plan on implementing (I'll divulge more in future posts). Let's just say that when we're done with the nursery... I may let Drew sleep with Momma and I'll be chillin' in the Peter Pan room. Remember... Second Star to the right and straight on 'til morning!

I Officially Exist

2008-05-06T21:21:00.000-07:00

I guess that sounds a little existentialist... but what I mean to say is that Impact Marketing & Media is an official entity. I decided about a year ago to begin my own company that focuses on helping small Christian business owners market their business, and along with that being able to create marketing material to go along with this goal. The marketing side will take some time to develop, but the media side of the business is starting-off strong. So far, I have a built in account with "My Day Job" for creating vinyl stickers, signs, and logos for our equipment, and I have been able to do some special projects for friends to help them get their businesses going (I need some good references). Soon, I hope to delve more into the digital media realm with video and audio, but for right now my vinyl cutter and my plotter are keeping me busy enough.

What's funny is that doing this job is like having a mullet haircut... it's all business in the front, but a party in the back. Even though I'm getting paid, I enjoy creating logos, signs, and doing projects that I had no idea how to effectively do six months ago. Imagine that... doing what I enjoy and getting paid. Hopefully someday, I'll be doing the Impact Marketing-thing fulltime.

Calling My Baby By Name

2008-04-23T20:33:00.000-07:00

I have to admit my level of anxiety has grown over the past few weeks, as we've gotten closer to April 23rd. From our first doctor appointment in February, Nik and I have spent countless hours dreaming of what the future will hold for us and the new addition to our family. Yet, we have held-off on our "important" planning until we officially find-out if we're having a boy or a girl.

Although it really didn't matter to me whether the baby was a boy or a girl, I had to quietly hope that it was a boy for the standard muchismo reasons: 1) A boy will carry on the family name 2) I understand boys. 3) I have no idea what do with a baby girl. What I found difficult to deal with was the waiting. Waiting to get the ultrasound to be scheduled, or for the day of the ultrasound to come. It seemed like waiting forever while the doctor checked everything over on the baby... except its gender. She began by looking at the heart... both boys and girls have hearts (except teenage girls but that's another blog). Then the lips... both boys and girls have lips, too. Eyes, ears, toes, fingers, spinal column... none of which is gender exclusive. Well the baby was laying on its side and being very polite in not showing the goods (if you know what I mean). So much so, that she made a comment that led Nik and I to think that our child's modesty was going to get in the way of our finding-out what we wanted to know. Finally, the doctor seemed to get all the pictures and measurements that she needed, and requested that Nikki roll over on her side to try to get our child to cooperate with our gender analysis. Finally after a little coaxing, the doctor was able to get a picture that made it very apparent that we are having an Andrew Ryan Palmer. We couldn't be happier!

My Infection

2008-04-21T14:38:00.000-07:00

Catchy title, huh? Saturday afternoon at Urgent Care I was diagnosed with bronchitis (although the hypochondriac in me says there is still a possibility of Sars or Bird Flu). I have just about zero energy, and by the time this blog is complete, I will probably be crawling back to bed. I did want to share some observations that I have from watching television the past few days.
1. Disney channel(s) have more good shows on, per capita, than any other station, even at 3 in the morning
2. Every other commercial on televsion (other than Disney) is trying to tell me that I am broken... Or at least I must be, because all I keep hearing about is how I need to change my hair color, whiten my teeth, take pills to sleep better, and lose a significant amount of weight.
3. I am perplexed how I can watch Geico, Progressive, State Farm, and the General all make the claim that I can save over $350 per year over other insurance companies. I want to know which of their competitors charges such ridiculus rates that make a $350 difference to anyone.
4. The Burger King "figure" from the commercials creeps me out -- Big Time! It doesn't matter if he's playing football, greeting someone at their window sill with a breakfast sandwich or being a futuristic robot, he's disturbing and needs to go away! And that's not the medication talking.

My Nemesis

2008-04-15T22:02:00.000-07:00

I played in a golf tournament Monday at Gainey Ranch in Scottsdale. I played well, but I have to speak for a moment about this hole on the "Lakes Course." You'll notice the unique water feature with the waterfall feature (just to the right of the green). Being left-handed, this 171 yard shot plays difficult for me, because my ball likes finding its way to the edge of the collar, and then rolling-off and getting wet. Last time I played this course, I hit a beautiful shot that landed about 3 feet from the edge... it rolled into the lake. So, being a bit egotistical, I hit an identical ball that landed about four feet from the edge, it rolled-off too. At that point I've accumulated four strokes on a par three hole, and I don't even have a ball in-play. So finally I put a decent ball in play and end up shooting a Snowman (that means an eight for the non-golfer). Anywho, I stepped-up to the Tee Box on Monday, and put the ball ten feet from the cup and six feet from the edge of the water. I parred it baby!

This round: Jason 1 Lake 0

WEEK 16:

2008-04-06T22:09:00.000-07:00

We made it to Week 16! We have our next appointment with our doctor on Tuesday, and he'll give us our date to get our ultra-sound that shows the sex of our Elladrew (we're not sure yet if we are having an Ellie or a Drew, so until then we call him/her Elladrew). More news later this week.

The Unsung Heroes

2008-04-06T21:18:00.000-07:00

About 10 years ago I saw No Doubt and Cake in concert at Desert Sky Pavillion in Phoenix. I was a fan of both bands at the time, and I really, really, really was looking forward to watching Cake's guitarist. Being a guitarist, myself, I love seeing how different genres of music are played, and what makes each type of music different. I had a great time watching this guy. He appeared to be only about 5'3" and he was playing a full-sized Gretsch guitar that covered most of his body when he squatted down. After playing five songs, it was obvious that the band was disgusted with the lack of fan participation and walked off-stage. They didn't feel like the crowd was "responding" to them and so they didn't think it was worth playing any more songs.
Why do I tell this story and what does it have to do with Unsung Heroes?
After playing guitar at Palm Valley Church, for 2 1/2 years, I've become inspired by certain crowd members when I'm playing. As a Christian, I play for God, and I would show up to play if only a handful of people showed-up to worship every week. Yet I find that in the midst of the 2000 people I can see from the stage every week, I am constantly drawn to about a dozen people,who consistently show-up and remind me of the importance of the job I have been given. I may only be the guitarist (the one who doesn't wear shoes when he plays), but I know that the role I play in a church service is important. Maybe it inspires people to live differently, or gives them comfort in their lives, or maybe even changes their lives' forever. They don't realize that they are of any significance to me personally, but I look forward to seeing them the weeks that I play. So, as not to name names... thank you to the people who inspire me to be a better worshipper!
PS- I was prompted to write this, when I noticed one of the dozen people walk-in depressed this morning. It was obvious that something had gone wrong that morning, but through the course of the first three songs, you could tell that the problems had melted away, and hope for a brighter day had been restored. Thank God there is a bigger picture than our tunnel-vision can sometimes see!

Pound Me, Dawg

2008-03-27T20:44:00.000-07:00

I never considered the art of the "fist-bump" controversial, until my friend Pete brought it up on his blog. I would like to state, for the record, that I am a firm believer in the hug, handshake, fist-bump, and my personal favorite... the "Good Game" ( )( ). I feel the congratulatory head-butt may be a little passe, and the "hello kiss" should be reserved for wives and moms (your own preferably). Yet I'm compelled to believe that the world is a better place because men have learned an expression of excitement that can provoke other men to new levels of testosterocity. Think of O.C.D. germ-a-phobics like, Howie Mandel, who have a hard time shaking hands; or the Chinese, who merely bow towards each other. How do they release the cleansing power of their endorphines?
If you think about it...Couldn't all the world's problems be solved over a good sporting event and about a dozen fist-bumps? After world peace is attained, won't world leaders want to seal-the-deal with a "good game?" Maybe that's taking it a little too far, but I don't want my children to grow up in a world where bumping is a crime. I say, "VIVA LA BUMP!"

The Middle of #14... Embrace the Y Chromosome

2008-03-25T22:25:00.001-07:00

It's been awhile... but we are now in the midst of fourteen weeks of pregnancy, and I feel the need to dedicate this blog to my unborn child (once again). I think it's probably fairly common that the father hopes for a little boy, and the mother hopes for a baby girl during pregnancy. I am bent on throwing the ball with my son, and Nik wants to put pony tails in a little girls hair. I'm having a hard time with having the patience to wait until April 20th, when we find out the sex of the baby. We've heard all the old wives' tales and had various people say to do "this and that" and you'll be able to tell the sex of the baby, but when all is said and done, I like slipping into bed at night, crawling up next to Nik's belly and saying (ever so gently), "Embrace the Y Chromosome." I know it may not work, but we'll find out.
Scientifically speaking, the baby is about four- five inches long now (four according to our last ultra-sound a few weeks ago), and already moving all around. We're expecting the first kick in the next few weeks, and Nik sometimes has felt "something" , although she can't tell if it's the baby, or something else ( I say it's gas... I hope she doesn't read this). Anywho... this is really an exciting time.

California Dreamin'

2008-03-09T20:54:00.000-07:00

Nik and I spent a long weekend with my parents, Shaun (brother) and Natalie (Shaun's wife). We stayed in a condo on Mission Bay in San Diego, and had what we would consider, the last family vacation before the six of us turns into seven.
Mom and Dad vacation in San Diego every year, and in 2007, they found a place on the beach that rents segways (pictured to the left). These crafty little inventions are so much fun. Once standing on them, they have an on-board sensor that keeps you balanced at all times. Then all you need do is lean your hips forward to go forward and pull back to slow down. Quite in-genious. They even have a governor on the throttle, so that if you try to go more than 12mph, it slows you down, by adjusting the handle bars back toward your body. Anywho, Mom and dad decided that we all needed to try these contraptions out.. So after breakfast on Friday morning, the six of us ventured over to the segway store and learned how to ride. Long story short, here is a picture of Nikki and Natalie cruising down the path on the beach. We had a ball, and... I think I found a way to enter the next half-marathon with Nikki. You don't think they'd notice if I rode one of these do you?

My Epiphany

2008-03-04T19:17:00.000-08:00

Okay, it's kinda lame, but I have to share it. I think God gave me an epiphany as it pertains to the sex of the baby. I'll explain. I'm in my early 30's and about two months ago I received an AARP membership card (American Association of Retired Persons). For months my wife would laugh as I would get visibly upset when SunHealth would send us mail to switch our medicare provider, or an investment firm would mail us an invitation for a dinner meeting to discuss how a reverse mortgage would make it easier on our children when I am deceased.

At first I dismissed the occurence by assuming that someone mistyped my information in the computer and entered my age as 60 instead of 30. An honest mistake right? WRONGO? When daydreamin on my way home today, I was thinking of what the initials would be if we had a boy versus a girl. For a girl we are thinking Elizabeth Grace Palmer (EGP)... not very exciting. If we have a boy we're naming him Drew Ryan Palmer... I am sorry Drew is short for Andrew, leaving us with:

Andrew

Ryan

Palmer

Coincidence... We'll find out...

That's FPU Approved

2008-03-02T21:05:00.000-08:00

I just finished writing the check to pay-off our Trailblazer. We attended Financial Peace University at Palm Valley, and the last bit of debt we owe, other than our house, is about to be wiped-out. I can't tell you how good that feels. I highly recommend the class. I see how it has changed the way Nik and I handle our money, and I don't know how we functioned before. Another great success story can be found on my buddy Pete's blog.

Peace in the Pasture People

My settings have changed

2008-03-02T16:06:00.000-08:00

I have heard from several people that they couldn't comment on my blog... I noticed I have it set to not allow anonymous users to comment. Unless crazy or unappropriate posts start coming in, I am allowing anyone to comment. Sorry for any inconvenience this may have caused.

-Management

Week 11: Neurons Multiply (What About the Protons and Electrons?)

2008-03-02T15:51:00.000-08:00

11 weeks down, 29 more to go. Time is flying-by and Nik is starting to see some significant changes. Besides feeling "yucky" alot, we are starting to notice a "lump" developing in her abdomen. She is not so enthused about this development, because on a subliminal-female hottie scale, this is the phase that's in-between the rock hard abs that she had from working-out and having a big ole pregnant belly. In other words, her skinny jeans don't fit her like she would like. From my standpoint, her belly is catching-up with mine, and we now have more in-common (she doesn't think that is nearly as funny as I do).

So the baby is in week 11 and we're almost through our first tri-mester. Our doctor's appointment from last week was moved to this Tuesday, and we have another appointment on March 11th, where hopefully we get an ultra-sound. Stay tuned.

Will We Find out the sex of the baby?

2008-02-24T19:56:00.000-08:00

Although we expect our child to abstain from sex until marriage...J/K

This has been the most popular question we have been asked. The answer is "Yes," we are Type "A" people, and therefore planning is a necessity. In fact, the anticipation is driving us crazy. We find out April 16th.

It's Official... It's a "Fetus"

2008-02-24T19:46:00.000-08:00

For those "not understanding" the last blog... Nikki is ten weeks pregnant. That's a quarter of the way there, and I feel a little ... unprepared. It's been incredible to have friends and family that have stepped-up to give us advice and a "play-by-play" on what we should be expecting. We also found a great website that medically describes how the baby is forming. Guess what.. It's officially a fetus... but if it's alright with all of you out in Blogville, we would still prefer to refer to it as a baby. Anyway, we have a doctor's appointment on Tuesday afternoon, and I am so looking forward at being at the appointments and getting to share in this amazing experience with Nik.

PS- Psalm 139 has taken-on new meaning.

Subliminally Speaking

2008-02-22T18:41:00.000-08:00

I am always amazed how the brain works. Common everyday messages can be decoded by different people, and take on different meanings based on what is said (or read). Men have a specific way of saying what is on our mind and hearing only what we want to hear. We grunt through life with child-like ignorance, making us believe that somehow, through osmosis , sleeping in the same room as our wives will make us more coherent of her thoughts and feelings between bedtime and morning. Sickness is what it is! Of course, upon waking-up in the morning, I find myself rubbing my belly, and wondering why the conversation we had the night before seem to have totally different implications. She asked for more help around the house with dinner, and all I seemed to hear is "Dinner is Spaghetti with Prego and garlic bread." Of course she was looking for a... "Momma-mia, how can I be of service, my Little Italian Chef?" Isn't it funny how some people can read between the lines and for others you have to spell it out. By the way, I'm gonna be a Daddy in September.

These Are A few of My Favorite Things...

2008-01-21T20:55:00.001-08:00

While attempting to find pictures from my last blog, I ran into a few gems from small group get togethers. Now let's get out there and melt some faces!!!!

My New Year's Resolution

2008-01-21T20:37:00.000-08:00

I love the gym at New Year's time. The parking lot is packed with people who obviously have stated, yet again, "I'm going to get in shape this year." These are the same people that will be paying for the next two years on a gym membership they use once a month, and the membership card will stay in their possession until they have the New Year's resolution of getting rid of senseless wastes of money. I feel the train has sailed for my fitness resolution of losing twenty pounds and having biceps so large that "I'll have to sell tickets to the gun show." ... But I digress... My resolution this year is to forego instant gratification. What does this mean?!? I 've decided this year to take babysteps. I am so eager to tackle a goal like losing twenty pounds, that I push myself hard for a week or two, and then get discouraged at the amount of ground I haven't made up. So this year, my goal is to tackle all my large goals in "bite-sized" sections. I'm reading the Bible over the course of the year (PVC Route 66), I'm shooting for losing two pounds by February 1st (Valerie Bertinelli inspired me), and I plan on increasing my guitar repetoire one song at a time (I'm taking requests). It's a long road ahead, but it's easier tackling every day one-at-a-time, instead of tackling the whole year today. I'll keep you updated on progress.

Run Chang Run

2008-01-15T21:04:00.000-08:00

My wife is my hero. After months of training, she ran in the PF Chang's Rockin' 1/2 Marathon on Sunday. 13.1 miles of sheer "amazingness." She finished in 2 hours and 38 minutes, crushing her goals of finishing the race in three hours. This may not seem like quite an accomplishment until you look at the course they ran, and figure that they basically went from downtown Phoenix to ASU Sundevil stadium, via McDowell Road.
Seeing 25,000+ people running was quite an amazing thing to watch from 44th St and Van Buren, but it was even more amazing to get to have her run by, and see that she had enough energy to finish the last 3.6 miles of the run. It was also neat to see other friends family at the race, and get to support them. Nik's cousins ran(Stacey and Jayson), along with my roommate from college (Allen), and my Nertz partner Deb, whose husband Pete played guitar in my stead at church so I could go to the race (You Da Man Pedro!). In all, it was inspiring watching my wife conquer a goal, and cross an item off of her "life list" of things to-do.

PS -- Nertz is worth 25 points if you go out first.

And to all a good night

2007-12-26T20:57:00.000-08:00

Another Christmas came and went. Eggnog was drank, presents were opened, and familes were pleased. On Monday, we woke up at my Mom and Dad's house to celebrate "Christmas morning" one day early. Growing-up, I can remember Christmas' being the greatest time of year. Opening presents, time-off work and school, unnaturally cold weather- what could be better. Christmas was always special, and this year was no exception. After opening presents, we upheld the third annual "Reindeer games." Over the years my Mom gets excited every year to invent new games that she, Dad, Shaun, Natalie, Nik, and I can play. This year we did movie puzzles, threw balls at five gallon buckets, and .... to sum it all up... Nik and I got our butts handed-to-us by Shaun and his wife Natalie. Nonetheless, we all had fun. My parents have always made Christmas a time to look forward to, and I hope that someday when we have kids, we can inspire the same excitement in them.

I Wish You a Merry X-Mas!!!

2007-12-10T20:47:00.000-08:00

In this "holiday season", I find myself attempting to become entrenched in the Christmas spirit. I love Christmas. I love everything about Christmas-- from its deep spiritual tie into my life, to the broad senseless commercialism that retailers have created. Some choose to celebrate by blowing all their money, I believe that Christ is the center of the holiday and that all Christmas sales are F.P.U. approved.
Anywho, Chip Davis from Mannheim Steamroller does a segment on the radio during this time of year, and I thought it was worth sharing. For years I heard churches comment that "we have taken the Christ out of Christmas" (That's why they spell it with an X). Here is Chip's comment on this statement.
http://www.streamaudio.com/listen?station=KRMG_AM&streamtype=archiveaudio&filename=120707.wma

In short, X Mas comes from the 12th Century Greeks, and the "X" represents the 22nd letter of the Greek alphabet, which happens to be the first letter in their word for Christ. Although I like the analogy of "taking the Christ out of Christmas," I also enjoy the fact that non-Christians, who add the X to try to upset Christians, are merely re-stating what we are already cognisant of... You can't take Christ out of Christmas!

Take that, Atheists!

Things I'm Thankful For...Or... An Ode to Thanksgiving

2007-11-17T20:55:00.000-08:00

My wife, my cats, my parents, my brother and new sister-in-law; a good education; friends that care, church family, a job (that pays on a regular basis); Eric Clapton; the guy who taught Eric Clapton to play; people who know how to drive without the use of a cellphone; a great childhood; people who read this blog over my shoulder... while I'm still typing... ahem ; Scrubs; the other white meat; a roof over my head; Thanksgiving dinner; flamingos; Dumb and Dumber; and of course my blog-dience, which refers to the audience of my blog.

Thank you! You stay classy... Planet Earth!

PS- Thank you for Anchor Man

Scrubs... The final season

2007-11-03T20:05:00.000-07:00

In the land of reality television, where the sitcom is slowly losing ground to such masterfully done shows as Survivor:Yuma and The-Not-S0-Real World: Season 42 (The Retirement Years). It is a shame to see another sitcom go off-the-air. This season of Scrubs will be the seventh and final season of one of the last comedic sitcoms of this millenium. Nik and I have watched the show faithfully for the past few years, and we own the DVD's of the first 5 seasons, so you can imagine our chagrin of finding-out that the characters we have come to know and love will end sometime in early '08.

I come from a lifetime of sitcom enjoyment, to name a few: MASH, Cheers, The Cosby Show, Night Court, Mad About You, Perfect Strangers, Full House, Frasier, Everybody Loves Raymond, Seinfeld, and Friends. All of these had their time on prime time television, and all of them enjoyed a stint of success, and now enjoy reaping the profits from a thing we call "syndication." Isn't it interesting, though, how a writer can create a fascinating group of characters, that if they can make it into Season 2, they have a chance to become a household name. Yet, at some point, a writer can only develop a character to a certain point before they become trivial to viewers. In many circumstances, characters that were young become "middle-aged", marriages happen, children are conceived and grow to be teenagers, and eventually we lose interest in these characters, and most people can't remember how many of the aforementioned sitcoms even ended.

Are we the same way? Do we lose our zest over time? Nik and I are more exciting now than when we were in college... We don't have the same energy levels, but that's another blog. We travel to more exotic places than Apache Junction, and we enjoy a wealth of friends that I feel enrich our lives in many different ways. To even begin to name the people would take-up more cyberspace than Google would allow, but I am so thankful that because of these friends, we won't have to worry about being "too mundane for prime-time."

Lights...Camera...Blog

2007-10-30T21:20:00.001-07:00

Hellooooooo! Is there anybody out there? This whole blog thing kinda creeps me out. It's a little unnerving to think that my thoughts have a home on the internet. Anywho, after months of debating whether I have anything to say that is worth other people reading, I decided to start blogging. After reading my friend Michael Gray's blogs, its amazing to me how one man can be so transparent and yet be so "manly" all at the same time. So here is my feeble first attempt. Thanks for your courage Mikey!

I had a conversation last night with two friends about perfectionism. Webster's dictionary would define perfectionism as : not Jason Palmer. It boggles my mind how people can be perfectionists, when so many people (including myself), are being pulled in so many directions mentally and physically that we lack the ability to be great at anything. I would truly love to be the world's greatest marketer... or guitar player... or friend... or most importantly-husband, but if I craved perfection in any of these realms of life, I would set myself up for failure in all the rest. Instead I'm going to strive to be the best that God will allow me to be in every facet of life, and by the grace of God, He'll make me successful.

Hats-off to those perfectionists that can stand to live in a world full of A.D.D. people.